How well do you love yourself?
Today I'd love to share some wise words about a love that's often ignored.
A love of a different kind.
Self love was a difficult one for me. Somewhere along the line my brain got confused with the difference between self love and arrogance.
When someone spoke about self love it would feel as though my insides would squirm uncomfortably.
Then that L'Oréal ad came out telling us that "we can" because "we are worth it". This had me squirming again because I used to think... how can I be worth it and someone else not?!?! ...enter Life Coaching... and my world was turned upside down! I realised just how unhealthy my thoughts about myself were! Not that I now think I'm "worth it" more than another... I now see how we are ALL worth it!!! Every one of us! - Yes, even YOU!!! So, I started to explore this thing we call LOVE and then to explore SELF LOVE.
This is what I have discovered. Love is patient and kind. So, self love too is patient and kind. How are you patient with yourself? How are you kind to yourself? What does that look like for you? Love does not envy or boast. You see, I had this warped idea that if you loved yourself then surely you must be arrogant, boastful and think you are better than everyone else! Heaven forbid! I vowed I would NEVER be THAT person!!!! No wonder I had such a warped view of self-love! You can certainly have a healthy love for yourself, for who you are to the world, without being arrogant or rude. You know you are absolutely loveable because you know you are Gods creation and He has said that what He created is GOOD. VERY GOOD in fact! Love is not arrogant or rude. Well, now we are talking! It IS possible to love ones self without being arrogant and rude! Well I never! What does this self-love look like then? Let's continue.... Love does not insist on it's own way. When you love yourself, it doesn't matter so much any longer whether somethings go your way or not. You have a certainty about yourself, so are happier to "let it go". Love is not irritable or resentful. When you know who you are and that you are grounded in love, you can't but help be less irritable and less resentful! In fact, resentment becomes a complete waste of energy! When you are grounded in love then compassion, patience and empathy for the struggles others are going through becomes the norm. Love is not happy with lies, but celebrates truth. When you love yourself, you know you are worth more than a complicated messy web of lies. You start to feel much more comfortable with truth. You celebrate truth, even when the truth about something is painful to bear. You bear it in love. Love bears all things. Yes, when you have self love, you can accept truth. You can accept hurts, sorrows and setbacks. You know who you are and that you are loved no matter the circumstances. And strangely enough, less things wind you up or bug you. You know that you know that you will come out the other side and all will be good still. Love believes all things. When you love yourself and therefore have what it takes to choose to love others, you believe the best about yourself and others. You believe what IS possible. You inspire, you thrive, you write a much better story about this thing we call life. Love hopes all things. When you love yourself you have this insatiable knowing that gives unending hope in all circumstances. You always hope for the best. How wonderful life becomes! Love endures all things. So long as there is hope, you will be able to endure any situation you face on this earth! Where there is hope, there is a flame that never dies, a flame that keeps on keeping on and you cannot do anything else but endure. And what's more is that you endure more lightly and with greater peace. Love never ends! Anyone who has lost a loved one knows that love never ends....it keeps on loving...forever. Is there any other way than the option to learn to love yourself more fully? I am delighted to gift you with a few practical tips on small things you can incorporate into each day to purposefully develop a greater love for yourself. These are simple steps that you can start taking today.
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